Procreating- part one

May 28, 2006 at 3:31 am | Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

   “So, when are you guys having another one?”
   Ahhh!  Why do people think it’s ok to ask that?  I mean, I am fine with getting into it with close friends, but really!  People have walked up to my husband and I and just asked us.  Mainly people I am somewhat familiar with, as in my family knows someone in their family; But I don’t really have a personal relationship with them.  How is that their business?!  Maybe I am being overly sensitive about this, but I really think it’s just NOSEY!  I have considered the noneya option, but not everyone would see the humor in me just blurting out “noneya- how’s your mom doing?”  Most would either say “huh- whaddya say?” or just not get it and repeat their question again.  Then there is the third group, upon finally catching on, would get really offended.  In reality, if I was to do this, my husband would be sooo mad at me!  A girl can dream of protecting her privacy, though…  

   As a mother of a nearly two and a half year old daughter, I am just finally coming around to actually beginning to consider having another child.  There is sooo much to consider, though.  First and foremost- I have a pituitary tumor.  This effects my hormones.  It would (*probably- I don’t want to jinx anything here) be difficult for me to get prego right now.  Not to mention it just would not be smart.  I am overweight.  I was when I was pregnant with Hali, but I have since put on about 12 pounds- putting me uncomfortably close to the obese category.  Towards the end of my pregnancy I was borderline diabetic- I could easily cross that line if I got pregnant without losing any weight.  So there are health issues galore.

   I have NOT forgotten how PAINFUL it is to have a baby.  I was probably in labor just longer than “average”- meaning if you took everyone’s number of hours in labor, then divided it by the number of women counted, I would be right there in the middle, I’d bet.  I made it without any “help” until the doc decided to I needed to have an emergency c-section.  Or, what I like to refer to it as TEN HOURS OF LABOR FOR NOTHING!  By the time this decision was made, I had been “stacking” or having continual contractions with no break between for over an hour.  Yep, I remember VERY clearly.  Not that it wasn’t all worth it, SHE WAS WORTH IT AND THEN SOME!  Now, some women thing that I got out of it easy.  I WISH I didn’t have Hali via c-section.  Recovery SUCKED!  It took me a long time to get over the only major surgery I have had to date. Ok, I’ll move on. 

   Right now, we could not financially handle another baby.  There are a lot of people (for instance one who asked us that wonderful opening question last week) who have the faith to believe that if you just keep poppin’ ’em out things will take care of themselves.  In fact, this same man told my husband that it was a sin for us to not have more.  Not in the “oh, what a shame” sin kinda way, the sin against The Big Guy kinda way.  Yes, this took place in church, so he meant it.  I just can’t help it.  I have to use my head just a little here.  ‘Nuff said. 

   WHHAAHH! My family lives across the country.  So I can count on help from them only as often as my dear, wonderful mom can fly down here.  HELP from MOM is IMPERIATIVE!  Not to mention that through us moving around so much, my hubby has left a TON of baby stuff behind.  We left Texas weeks before he did, and he just left stuff behind after the trailer got to the overflowing point.  So we would have to buy a lot of new baby stuff.  The STUFF that comes with babies is EXPENSIVE! 

   And last, but certainly not least:  the urge just isn’t that strong enough.  I really don’t feel like having another baby right now.  I always wanted to have kids about 3 years apart or just over.  Hali is two and a half.  Time is just about up.    

   So this is what I am working with…next up- what is working against me staying a single-child parent.


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